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Guys Reveal What They Actually Mean When They Say They're “Dating” Someone


Literally, what does “dating” even mean? I don’t know if that means my guy and I are just texting, hanging out with 30 other people, seeing one another exclusively, or on the fast track to marriage. And for that matter, if you’re hooking up with someone, can that mean you’re just kissing or are you having sex?

Does anyone really know what “dating” means anymore? Romance exists in such a label-less, blob-like, grey area now, everything seems pretty much undefinable. This may seem convenient, until you actually have feelings for someone, in which case, your relationship turns into a living nightmare of constantly checking your phone, social media stalking, and being too afraid to ask questions of your potential partner.

Well, in this handy-dandy Reddit thread, a group of men attempt to define what “dating” and relationships mean to them. For some, it’s trying to find a girlfriend, and for others, it just means swiping until you find a mediocre girl to have sex with. How fun!

This guy thinks it’s science or something.

Measuring the ratios of various radioactive isotopes in a sample to determine the age of something.


I love a man with a sense of humor. Hee hee hee.

This guy says it’s hanging out with someone you’re attracted to.

Hanging out with someone of the opposite sex who you are attracted to and getting to know them better. Could be at home, a walk,a bar, a restaurant etc…. just spending time with another person.


What does “hanging out” mean, though?!?!

This guy says it means consistency and a relationship.

I’m 29. To me dating is going out with a woman and hopefully turning that into something that is more consistent, leading to sex and a relationship.


He gets it.

This guy thinks all relationships are about making pointless lists.

Making a list of information about someone, until you realise you don’t like them.


He sounds fun.

It means getting to know someone better for this guy.

Getting to know another person better with aims of forming a relationship or to get intimate with them.


This guy says it’s inexpensive meals and casual sex.

At 21, I just am trying to have sex with girls. I’ll suggest a inexpensive date with the hopes of bringing them home. Or I’ll just ask them to come over.

I guess if I met a really good girl I would move towards something more serious



This guy says it’s a lot of swiping in hopes of having sex.

Right swiping and sending out dozens of messages and talking to a bunch of random obnoxious bar girls in the hopes that eventually one of them will let me put my penis somewhere in their body

Tldr, it’s a pain in the ass


But the good news is, it looks like this guy is 4/20 friendly! Line up, ladies! Swipe right!

This guy says it’s mostly fantasizing.

staring at someone during a bus ride and imagining our life and 2 kids together before she gets off the bus


Is this guy me? This guy is me.

It also means spending a lot of money, according to this guy.

A societal construct that is a terrifying obstacle for me to be able to build healthy relationships with women and get to know them on a deeper more intimate level. It’s also important to note how it’s an impractical money sink for me at this stage of my life.


It means dating multiple people until you find the right one for this guy.

Going out with different people in order to facilitate the development of a relationship of some kind.


But this guy maybe puts it best.

Pre-wife interviews.


So as it turns out, dating means a lot of different things to a lot of different guys. Hopefully, one day, we’ll come to a common consensus. Until then, just keep freaking out about whatever it is you and your guy are doing, I guess!

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Alison Segel

Ali is a writer with bylines at Vice, Refinery 29, XO Jane, Hello Giggles, and Fashion Canada. Follow her on Twitter @OnlineAlison or Instagram @alibaby90.

Ali is a writer with bylines at Vice, Refinery 29, XO Jane, Hello Giggles, and Fashion Canada. Follow her on Twitter @OnlineAlison or Instagram @alibaby90.

Guys Reveal What They Actually Mean When They Say They’re “Dating” Someone


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