Ever wonder what office supply your boyfriend would say you are if you could be any office supply? I’m going to go ahead and guess you haven’t really thought about that before. But, now that I asked you that question, I BET YOU’RE THINKIN’ ABOUT IT.
I mean, there are so many options to choose from. There are office chairs and staplers. There are printers and paper clips. And there’s literally every single item sold in an Office Depot or Staples store. The possibilities are literally endless.
Recently, guys on Reddit were recently asked to describe what office supply their girlfriends would be, and why they chose what they did, and let’s just say their responses are as weird as you’d imagine. Here are some of their best answers.
She’s a computer… and apparently, those go down on people?
A computer. I can always turn her on, and then she’ll go down on me.
She’s a cheap office chair.
An ex of mine is like an inexpensive office chair; cheap, easily replaceable, everyone wants a sit, and while it looks comparable to a higher end model on the outside, its filled with poor materials.
She’s a nice office chair.
Office chair. Supportive, comfy & fun to ride.
She’s a laser printer.
A laser printer. I don’t have a laser printer.
She’s a computer.
A computer. Seemingly more complex than I can comprehend in one sitting, if there is ever an issue it’s user error, but it is also my lifeblood and I don’t know what life would be like without it.
She’s a keyboard.
My keyboard: I put my hands on her all the time and it feels amazing every time. I get her dirty, and in turn, she gets my hands dirty. Win-win.
She’s a desk lamp.
She’s like a lamp: I turn her on every day, and she lights up my life.
She’s not just any desk — she’s a standing desk.
She’s like a truly comfortable standing desk: tall, dignified, good for my health, and non-existent.
She’s an average printer.
Printer: works great 60% of the time with no fuck ups.
The other 40% it sends me mixed messages and even when I do exactly what I am suppose to do and what I am told to do, it still doesn’t work and I’m up shits creek pondering “what am I doing wrong?!”
She’s a fax machine. Who knew those still existed?
A fax machine. She has a story to tell, but it takes ages to get to the end.
Now, time to go home and ask your boyfriend what office supply he thinks you’d be! And if he thinks you’re a desk lamp, then that’s a great answer. But if he says you’re a fax machine, he’s got another thing coming.
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Candice is a staff writer here at Elite Daily. She possesses both the body and the humor of a 15-year-old boy while she enjoys the lifestyle of a 75-year-old woman.